It is the week before dead week, which basically means that life is literally hell at the moment (yes, I know I am dramatic). I am in the final stretch of my sophomore year of college, which basically for me means tears, three group project presentations, the last bit of homework, working my butt off to pick up my grades, studying, living in Gaylord, lots of coffee and a whole whole whole lot of stress (oh and did I mention tears?).
I literally feel like I am at my breaking point. I am almost halfway done with my college years, but the end seems so far away. Do not get me wrong, I love the University of Oklahoma and I absolutely love my major, but college is hard. I am using every last ounce of my energy, yet it still does not seem like it is enough.
After an hour of laying in my bed crying and ranting to my best friend on FaceTime, I had to pull myself together to go to my favorite study spot to get some work done. On the way there, I decided to FaceTime my Nana so I could see my two sweet baby cousins to help me cheer up a little bit. That was exactly what I needed.
My little princess Blakelee was snoozing, but luckily my sweet Kaden was awake. He usually is not the type to pay attention to me when I FaceTime (he is only four), but today it was like he knew exactly what I needed. In the sweetest little voice, I hear, “RaRa will you come to my house and play with me today please?” Oh, sweet boy if I was not two hours away I would be there in a heartbeat. I got to the library, so I had to say goodbye, and Kaden kissed the screen to tell me bye. Isn’t that just the sweetest?
That got me thinking, wow I am seriously so blessed. I have a family that loves me more than anything, I have friends that care about me, and most importantly, I have a God that is always on my side. What more could I ask for?
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6: 25-27
Sometimes you just have to step back and look at the bigger picture. Worrying will literally do nothing for anyone.Yes, I am stressed, but it is not worth it to literally make myself sick about it. I had to step back and realize that there is more to life than stressing about every little thing at school because I am a perfectionist. School and my education are very important to me and they are things I care about, but why let that stress consume me? I get up every day because of God and what He did for me and continues to do for me, nothing else. So that is the only thing I should let consume me.
When life gets overwhelming, step back and remember who you belong to. You belong to God, the creator of heaven and earth, me and you. Step back and think about all of the blessings God has placed in your life. I promise you that God is bigger than that feeling of anxiety and stress. Lean on Him to get you through it.